A young mother answers the door and gratefully accepts the Mother’s Day card from the Mariposa Program Team member.  Clutching it in her hand, she says, “I always look forward to the cards and letters that you send at special times.  It is like a gift from my daughter through you. Thank you for remembering me.”

It is especially difficult when a family loses a child to a life-limiting disease.  The UNM Mariposa Bereavement program understands that it is essential to help the family attain as normal a life pattern as is possible considering the circumstances.  The grief experience is often overwhelming in the early days after the death and continues to create emotional havoc in the lives of the surviving family members for some time after the loss.  Emotions may vary during a relatively short span of time between “I am doing fine” to “This has been a horrible day!” For this reason, the Mariposa Pediatric Hospice Team continues to follow the family for 18 months after the loss of their child.  The Team recognizes that support during the bereavement process is imperative to encourage and enable the grieving family to adapt to their loss.  In addition, psychosocial and spiritual support during this time may minimize the negative physical, emotional, social and spiritual consequences in the future.

• Contact from the Hospice Nurses, Social Worker, Chaplain and Volunteers
• Visits dependent upon the family’s need
• Telephone calls - Availability of team by phone whenever needed
• Grief counseling for the parents
• Recognition and support for the siblings

Periodic letters which provide:

• Education about the grief process
• Emotional and spiritual encouragement to the family
• Information on available Grief Groups for both adults and siblings
• Information on coping with grief during the holidays
• Cards - Sympathy...Christmas...Mother’s Day...Father’s Day
• A Birthday Card commemorating the deceased child’s birthday

Bereaved families or individuals may be referred to other community programs for the bereaved, as needed, if their needs cannot be met by the Mariposa Hospice Bereavement program.  Families may decline bereavement services at any time.

A Memorial Service is conducted to honor and remember all the children who have died during the previous year as patients on the Mariposa Hospice program.   This service is also extended to the families of all the children who have died in the previous year at UNM Children’s Hospital. The patients from each department are identified and invitations are sent to their families.  Each family also receives a telephone call at this time.

The UNM Mariposa Team coordinates the Memorial Service.  Many volunteers are asked to participate along with the health provider staff from various departments within UNM Children's Hospital.  This event provides a meaningful service that includes music, a message and a memorial segment that allows families to place a flower for their child in a bouquet.  A reception follows allowing staff, families and volunteers to meet informally.

A small library of resources is made available to the families.  It includes current books on the topics of death and dying of children and the grieving process.